Before
A chronicle of an American life
Archive for August, 2007
23 August 2007 at 2.07 am · Filed under Random
Citibank loves to send junk e-mails. Today I got one telling me, “There’s a safer way to handle your account,” and it included the picture below. Nothing else referred to safety or information security, so I assume the “safe handling” is some kind of cute joke.
Citibank says this “tree,” which almost certainly is now dead, will do wondrous things for all of us. If only I agree to switch to paperless statements, Citibank will go right ahead and plant a “tree” like the one in this person’s hand.
Well, that’s not so novel, I thought, but look what the tree does. “To put things in perspective, over a 50-year lifetime, one tree will generate $31,250 worth of oxygen, recycle $37,500 worth of water, and control $31,250 worth of soil erosion.” It adds up to exactly $100,000.
Are they serious??? First of all, if they are, I would be getting out of the banking business and right into the tree-owning business. Also, how much does oxygen cost these days? I should call down to the local Praxair, I bet you can get a whole ton of it for thirty-one thousand. Maybe they don’t know about this tree-sprig racket yet. Should I be trusting this bank with my credit rating?
P.S. Nobody told me how much CO2 Citibank’s paperless data centers put out.
6 August 2007 at 12.00 pm · Filed under Culture
Greetings from Denver. I have little time to write, so I’ll keep it brief. Kansas is mostly empty. Eastern Colorado is totally empty. The good news is both states let you drive reallllly fast. I have been taking a lot of good pictures, which I’ll try to post today or tomorrow, and it’s been a good visit so far.
That wasn’t really worth reading, was it? What compels me to write today, however, is the news that the New York Times becomes an inch and a half narrower today. (Even here in the American West, my ears are finely tuned to the machinations of the newspapers.) How could they shrink the Times? The whole fun of the Times is that it was essentially a giant tablecloth. Even someone as large as me would have to strain and stretch to read stories in the farthest corners of its pages. Moreover, while other papers got narrower, I always thought I could count on the Times for broad, expansive coverage. The paper is now smaller in size and stature.
3 August 2007 at 2.38 am · Filed under Solely personal
Gentle reader, my summer of relaxation has come to an end. From August ‘04 to May ‘07, I was in school and working full time continually. Over this summer, I’ve been lucky enough to just have to work, and that felt like a vacation. But all things come to an end, and school starts up again this month.
I’m taking one last trip before the final push. I’ve decided to drive out to Denver to visit my friend Amy, then come back via Chicago visiting my friend Dave. Along the way I’ll get to add a few new states to my list and see just how big this big country really is.
God willing, you’ll hear from me a little bit each day, as I post my adventures here. People tell me the drive across Kansas is a killer, and I guess we’ll find out. Since I’ve gotta stay overnight there and in Nebraska, there should be plenty of time to read and write. I’m looking forward to it.
