Author: Bill Cash

The inheritance tax

We have entered 2017, the year of the Republican takeover. I for one am excited to see what’s coming! (What alternative do I have? My law licenses aren’t any good in Canada or Europe or Britain. So tally ho, Trump!) One of the many legislative turds we’ll be seeing this...

CTA driver screams, then silence

So, this just happened: my Blue Line train may have been about to derail or be hit by an oncoming train. Not the way I was hoping to get home, frankly. I’m riding on the train from O’Hare. It’s a moderately full train since the station was rather full when...

Nice shiny things

“You have nice, shiny shoes,” she said, in almost a whine. I stop privately flexing my calves in line at the Chipotle and turn around. I sense something off almost immediately. Big fun sunglasses and lots of “fancy” jewelry, but take a second look: she’s not wearing socks, and it’s...

Pet Shop Boys set list for Donald Trump’s campaign

It couldn’t happen here. The prospect of a Trump win in the presidential election is looked on with horror by a solid majority of the developed world (even if you include the United States as a “developed country,” which some recent events have led me to doubt). But it’s not over till it’s...

Ice kicking season didn’t come

To hasten the end of winter, I like to go down the lake and kick ice. Every winter I’ve been here in Chicago has been brutal. Weeks and weeks of unending ice and grey sludge in the streets. Temperatures so low they lock up all the moisture in the air;...

Guest bathroom renovations (before and after)

In December 2015 I bought the Lake Shore Drive apartment I’d been living in for three years. It’s a great space, in a location I love, with killer views, but it needs some work. So for 2016 I am going to be having fun customizing it and upgrading it as...

The awkwardness of shouting in stores

Will shopkeepers stop yelling at me when I walk in? As soon as I’ve got through the door, I get a shouted “Hi!” Little is more predictably discomfiting. You know what I’m talking about: you come in off the street, brush the snow off your jacket, blink under the lights, and immediately...

Uber adds yet another creepy “feature”

Uber announces plans to use drivers’ GPS and accelerometer data to determine if drivers are speeding. The idea, according to them, is if the trip is too fast or there are sudden braking manuevers, that is something that they should be aware of and take up with drivers. So yet...

How to get unlimited cell phone data for FREE

I now have a cell phone plan that offers unlimited calling. Amusingly, AT&T sent me a letter about it, printed with ink on pieces of paper. AT&T then sent me an e-mail telling me that my “unlimited” data plan from a decade ago will be going up $5 a month...

2015 grammar update

Officially, on January 1 of every year, I review my grammar and punctuation and other orthographic preferences and decide whether I’m comfortable with the sad choices I’ve made thus far in my life. As in past years, I made the easy call to stick with “Internet” statt “internet,” and “e-mail” statt “email.” I know...

First class isn’t classy

I wrote this and posted it on a Delta Diamond Medallion group. Our kind has no future. Why are first-class people such assholes?! I am in 3A. 3B – I said “Hello,” then “How’s it going,” then made direct eye contact with him. No response whatsoever. I’m not looking to...

Bad design is everywhere

I just got a hand-me-down Apple keyboard.  It’s wireless.  It has a power button which can be momentarily depressed.  When you push it, a tiny little light shows up to let you know that the keyboard is on.  Apparently, it shuts itself off automatically, or the manual alleges it can...

Mom orders a drink

Last night I went out to dinner with my mom, who was supposed to meet me for dinner at Continental.  But she showed up at Phillips Seafood.  These restaurants are right next to each other and they don’t have walls (they’re inside Caesar’s Atlantic City). She had just ordered a...

One more thing lost

I’m watching The Pelican Brief (and I’m only 20 minutes in).  Two things stand out.  First of all, Cynthia Nixon played one of Julia Roberts’ law student friends, which is kind of hot.  I guess she got her Sex and The City J.D. by having a part in this film....

Aviation security

I rarely do this, but I’m simply going to link to a New York Times weblog posting from a commercial pilot.  While he doesn’t do a whole lot in the way of positive suggestions for security, he does kick the legs out from under several of the ridiculous security measures...