The unbearable unnaturalness of being
The organization DC Vote has put up a documentary movie on its web site called “Un-Natural State.”Â It’s worth the eight minutes.Â (You can also get a teacher’s worksheet because the video apparently complies with Washington ninth grade history and government class standards.)
If you watch this video, you’re going to learn two shocking things.
First, that DC Vote thinks we should rewrite our Constitution so our government can be more like Venezuela’s.
Secondly, thatÂ there is a guy who is the United States Senator for the District.Â I think it is so cute that Washington has a Senator!Â And, he’s a white former New Yorker!
If you do watch it, let me know what you think.Â The best part is when 35 seconds in, the narrator asks, “Are things really as they seem?”Â It’s quite ominous; the shot of birds flying over the head is pure Hitchcock.
The District’s “Senator” has no voting power–let’s keep this in mind. Vice President Cheney is the 101st voting senator, and the other 100 come from the 50 states
DC Vote may be too radical; this fate befalls many activist groups. We shouldn’t let their rhetoric obscure the central truth–the permanent disenfranchisement of the District’s residents. Just roll DC back into Maryland, and the problem’s solved.
Why is there all of this political mumbo jumbo on these pages? If the Mormans want another Senator why don’t they have some more babies with one or more of their wives?
Gun control, what gun control in DC? Every building there has a metal detector, and everyone knows you just stick the gun in the bushes outside the federal building, go in transact your business and pick a replacement up out of the bushes when you leave.
Why is there never any discussion about important things on this website? Things we care about like, its MAIL JEEP SEASON.
Or what shall we be in the Doo Dah Parade?
What about the joys of spring season? The flowers, the baseball players in their tight uniforms and the spring lamb season?
We need videos on this page of lambs frolicking across the flower leaden meadows, while baseball players stretch out their hamstrings and practice spiting for distance as they too run and frolic in the meadow.
If you continue to write this political commentary you will drive your readers away and then where will you be?
With no advertising to support your web pages, and all the paid readers gone, you will be forced to become a homeless person holding a sign saying something like,
“WILL MAKE POLITICAL COMMENTARY FOR MONEY”
Oh well.. I’m going outside now to smell the fresh … uh fresh lamb manure in the wind.
Signing off for now
On behalf of all sane people living in the District of Columbia, I have to express my embarrassment of this video. These people are great examples of the types of yahoos I do not want representing me to the rest of the nation. They made no attempt to rationally show the arguments for DC voting rights, were generally childish in their portrayal of the issue, and what the hell was that drunken circus music playing in the background!? It would be best for everyone concerned if you just forgot this video and moved on with your life.